Unusual Valentines Weekend

Well, I am sure I won't get online tomorrow so I am taking advantage of a few moments this morning.
Last year, tomorrow (2/13/09) I found out I was pregnant. C and I went to Columbia so he could take his EMT test and we had fun just trying to wrap our minds around the fact that we were finally having a baby. It took us awhile. I didn't realize then that the quiet evening dining and back at the hotel snuggling (I was tired), that we had that day was out last Valentines day just the two of us. Yes we may ship the kids off for a Valentines day in the future but we will have a kid to come home to or pick up for a long time and when they all move out (yes, I am planning on having more already) we will still not be "just the two of us" and I love that!
Anyway, with a 4 month old that is still nursing and needs quite a bit of attention we decided to not try to go to the Church Marriage retreat, rather we are watching my brother's three kids overnight and a good friends two little girls for a couple hours.
The plan for them is a afternoon of decorating sugar cookies, possibly playing out in the snow, and possibly making valentines. Tomorrow we will be doing "scavenger hunts" for the valentines they make for each other and a nice-ish breakfast and an afternoon of wii, playing outside (C will be here so he can help with it then), and eagerly looking for Mom and Dad to come home.
Not a typical Valentines weekend but we will have our family Valentines Sunday evening. We will be doing steak, Oreos, a side dish and a movie. Camping out on the living room floor till bed time. Pretty sure we will enjoy our evening even if we aren't out at a hotel or a restaurant. Especially if I get some spray whip cream. :)
Fun times... busy times.

Being accountable for a dream

Accountability according to the Mirriem-Webster dictionary means an obligation or willingness to accept responcibility or to take account for ones actions. This week I posted on my facebook page about a dream the C and I have been talking about. I want to start making some baby items to sell online and in local craft shows. Up until that post we had just been talking about it and dreaming but now I have a community of friends who know about my plans and will be following up with me on whether I have started to make products yet. The more people I tell the more accountable I am for this dream.
I put my dream out there now I have to act on it. Well, I could just tell people I gave up on it but who could really do that?
I have spent the week so far checking online to see how much the items I am interested in making go for looking for cute fabric, checking the cost and trying to make sure this could eventually be a profitable endeavor because yes this is a dream and I am looking forward to the fun of making things but it is also supposed to help supplement C's paycheck to help me stay home longer with Connor.
To make myself more accountable, here is the dream: I want to make unique reasonably priced baby related items to sell online (etsy or e-bay) and/or in shops here in town and at craft functions. Items I am going to start with are: burp cloths, coordinating blankets, pee pee tee pees, breast pads and nursing covers. Some ideas I am thinking of are: cloth wipes, headbands, slimline wallets for diaper bags, quilts with modern prints, bibs. I think I will call my "business" Baby Bubby.
So here is to being accountable for a dream!

Decency

Wow, I totaly meant to post more often, I mean come on I spend several hours a day in front of a computer everyday! Although it is hard to type with a nursing child in your lap.
So today I went to a site that I enjoy, not because I win free stuff all the time but because I learn about all sorts of stuff that is available, www.todaysgiveaway.net . The item up for grabs today is a topless undershirt from Blush, www.toplessundershirt.com .
"Why are you posting about this?"
Well, my little boy is 10 weeks old (wow, that happened fast) and not only am I nursing him but he has started to grab hold of my shirt or cover when nursing. I am so paranoid about flashing poor unsuspecting bystanders if I were to nurse in public that I just don't, if I know we will be out during a feeding time I just pump and before hand and deal with being uncomfortable until I can relieve pressure later. I know the areguments that nursing is a natural thing and nothing to be ashamed of, but... and for me this is a big BUT... I think that even though it is natural and not yucky that does not give me permission to flash my...ahem... ladies. The act that produced my little boy is perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of, doesn't mean I am going to do IT in public. So, back to the product at hand, if there is a way to nurse decently in public then I am interested in it.
Before my lil boy was born I looked into nursing covers for this reason. I couldn't afford the $35-$50 tag for them so I looked online at www.littlebirdiesecrets.com and found instructions to make my own nursing cover with all the bells and whistles of the $45 one I was drooling over for less than $10 (I think less than $5). That has me covered up top, and I thought I made it wide enough to cover my mid section too but I did not know just how much my lil boy would wriggle around when he had something covering his head when he ate! So seeing a product that won't get in the way, or complicate nursing anymore than it is already ( I still am not very "good" at nursing yet) gets me interested. Yes, I could probably try to find a diy tutorial to make my own but I don't have nearly the time that I thought a stay at home mom has. So for now, this "topless undershirt" has my interest and has earned a place on my wishlist.
Why? Because, for me decency is a must!

Fighting Sleep

I am holding Connor right now. This wouldn't be odd except that he should be sleeping and I should be doing laundry. Connor doesn't usually fight sleep. I typically lay him down for sleep and walk away. He may fuss for a little bit but no more than five minutes. If he doesn't go to sleep right away he will lay there and look at his hands. We had a long weekend at Grandma's and he wasn't quite on a schedule there, today we are recovering and he had been sleeping really well as he is so tired. I know that he is tired and should sleep, he knows he is tired but is fighting sleep. He doesn't know what he needs just what he wants.
Funny, I am like that too at times. Not only do I fight sleep at times when I know I need it, but I also fight other things even though I need them too. How often does God hold me in His arms knowing what I need and just watching me do what I want to do fighting what I need, be it resting in Him, trusting that He is in control, or even that I physically need to go to sleep.
Having some fight in you is a good thing. I know a little girl who fought to live, now she is 7 years old and doing well. But at times the same fight that can save our life physically or spiritually can keep us from what is good. Yet another case of our biggest assets being our greatest weaknesses.
Now Connor has finally gone to sleep, worn out from fighting it, but it is not a restful sleep. He is stirring, sucking on his pacifier and doesn't want to be put down. You see he may be asleep but he didn't willingly give in to it. He is only asleep because his little body has given up. How many times have I finally given in to what God has in store only because I didn't have a choice not because I actually wanted to.
So for now, I am learning lessons in life by watching my son.